43 Comments
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Helen Whelchel's avatar

Political funny stuff grabs me every time. You have a new fan. On Super Tuesday I wrote a wish list for Presidential candidates. You may fit into that list. Snooze alert: It is a little new-agist. I look forward to hearing how your campaign progresses. Who knows? You might get elected by write-in votes. You sure you want the job?

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Nothing would scare me more than being elected President. 😬🤣 What an all-consuming impossible job. At least 25% of the country will hate you out of party loyalty. And their party will fight everything you try to do. In my case, as an Independent, both parties would work against me. They might even cooperate—for a change—to oppose me. 🤣

I have to either laugh at the ridiculousness of current US politics or I get angry and depressed. So I am poking fun at it for my own sanity.

I read your list. I completely agree. That is what a President should be. If only...

Thanks, Helen.

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John K Adams's avatar

Thank you, Mr. S'tarlin.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Stupid auto-correct. 🤣 I fixed it.

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John K Adams's avatar

Our opponents are also fiction writers. But they deny that fact.

Our honesty about our ability to conjure up interesting stories will be appreciated. Or not.

Some think the public likes being lied to. Some think you can sell anything if you attach the label, 'follow the science.'

I think our 'fictions' are more revelatory of reality than many of the 'facts' spun by our opponents.

Time will tell.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Well said, Mr. Adams.

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Jack Herlocker's avatar

I saw the title and thought “Wait! Mark already has a hiking mate! He posted pics! Maybe not of the campaign trail, but some sort of wilderness trail?” A hiking mate is much more valuable, IMHO. Especially if someone hikes more than runs.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Yes, I am married to my hiking partner. I don’t do much running. Mainly for President. Although, I did run a 5k last year. My first ever, in 42 minutes.

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John K Adams's avatar

True story.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I wonder if us both being fiction writers will undermine the population's confidence in our words? I do love to make things up.

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

I am honored that, should you win the highest office, you would have me as your Secretary of Heartwarming Fiction and Overall No-Nonsense Advice. I am more than willing to serve At the Pleasure of the President! Thank you, Mark. Just one teeny, tiny point of clarification, though: I said I was happy to serve, not in the cabinet, but in the pantry.... you know, where the churros and do-nuts are stored. Starlin for President!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I plan to rename Cabinet to Pantry. That should be less confusing.

No worries either way, there will be churros and donuts everywhere.

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Jim Cummings's avatar

Yes, but will there be Snickers bars? Not the teeny ones.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

My cabinet members will get their pick of candy bars. Taxpayers are footing the bill! It's all free!

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Jim Cummings's avatar

I could see myself in your administration as Commissioner of Confectionaries. I would, of course, ban any candy with coconut and/or almonds. No one likes that stuff. I got ideas. You know where to find me.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Interesting. I am with you on coconut. I would not do well stranded on a desert island. But I don't mind Hershey bars with almonds. Which is okay. I don't want a bunch of "yes" people in my administration. I want people who tell me what they honestly think. No matter how wrong they are. 😉🤣

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Jim Cummings's avatar

Haha, That's me!

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just mud by Ron's avatar

I'm happy the milk shake, er cabinet situation worked out, and you've moved onto the serious roles. I'm with James Ron, Sharron absolutely will blossom in that role.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I agree. Why should old men get all the cushy roles.

Now all this talk of rolls has me hungry.

Thanks, Ron. 🤓

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James Ron's avatar

Sharron is a fine choice for your Secretary of Heartwarming Fiction and Overall No-Nonsense Advice, Mark!

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

You are too kind...

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I know! She is the best!

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

I am here to serve.

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John K Adams's avatar

Mark, I am honored to accept your offer.

Being VP is something I have aspired to since learning, on the first day of primary school, that I bear the same name as our country's first VP. I came home and asked my parents if I was named after one of our presidents. and they answered, "Which one?"

I think you are right that my skills as a fiction writer will come in handy in WDC.

I will serve honorably, and I promise, you needn't worry about conflicts arising. I won't bring a Yoko into the administrative mix.

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Jim Cummings's avatar

"Which one?" That's hilarious!

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

Starlin-Adams! That's the ticket! A partnership whose time has come!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Long overdue, if you ask me. 🤣

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Mark Starlin's avatar

🤣 I knew I could count on you. With your presidential name and my complete lack of political experience, we can't lose.

I should have asked this earlier. Do you play harmonica? When I sing my State of The Union addresses, I wouldn't mind some rippin' harmonica solos.

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John K Adams's avatar

I may be a bit rusty on the harp. But I know how to rip.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Sweet! Start practicing. We might do Heart Of Gold at campaign stops.

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

Frankly, one of the main reasons I support you, Mark, is that you do NOT have political experience.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I agree. I dislike the idea of career politicians (and political parties.) I think the Founding Fathers envisioned citizens serving for a breif time and then going back to their lives (like Washington did.) Government is supposed to serve its citizens, not rule over them.

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John K Adams's avatar

I used to hear the term 'public servant' all the time. Now they seem to think 'serving the public' is some kind of feast.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

It generally goes in order of importance:

1. Myself/my political career.

2. My political party (which gives me a career.)

3. Members of my political party (who vote for me.)

4. The other 75% of the population, if it doesn't affect my career.

Anyone who puts the public first doesn't get reelected.

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Jim Cummings's avatar

So true, Mark

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Mark Starlin's avatar

As Bruce Coburn stated so well: "The trouble with normal is it always gets worse."

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Bjorn Brunsberg's avatar

Probably the best 'haha' moment I'll have today, very clever.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Thanks, Bjorn. Vote Starlin Adam 2024! Candidates for those who still have a sense of humor. 🤓

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C.L. Steiner's avatar

Great choice! I’m still hoping for a place in your cabinet - how about right behind that can of soup?

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Thanks, C.L. I plan to have a large Cabinet. Perhaps Secretary of Pizza Quality would suit you?

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C.L. Steiner's avatar

I’m in, Mr. President. Wait till you see my pie charts!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

🤣 I look forward to your reports!

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John K Adams's avatar

And no cherry picking!

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