It’s pretend time. If you are not a writer [I know many of you are], pretend you are.
One morning, you wake up and find a genie’s lamp on your coffee table. Naturally, you rub it to see if Barbara Eden will pop out in a cloud of pink smoke.
She doesn’t. You are momentarily disappointed, but then you remember you have some wishes coming.
But this genie is not the usual bubbly genie, or scary genie, or hyper-active comedic genie, or formerly-popular rapper genie, or stock wish-granting genie. It is the writing genie. A sharply-dressed woman who looks at your unwashed hair, sweat pants, and t-shirt covered in cookie crumbs with disdain.
In a bored voice, the genie says, “Greeting, I’m the Writing Genie. You get one wish.”
“I thought genies gave three wishes,” you reply.
“Not in this fantasy. I have a slight case of wish block. I can only muster one wish today.”
“I wish for one billion dollars,” you quickly state.
“Yeah, right. Don’t we all? Not gonna happen, Sparky. I can only give writing-related wishes. And I chose the options. In fact, it is more of a choice than a wish.”
“What?”
“You would think a writer could follow a simple plotline. Let me spell it out for you. I will grant you one wish based on a choice between two things. You choose the option you prefer. And you have to choose one, or I will choose for you. Got it?
“I think so.”
“Alright. Would you rather write one hugely popular book that makes you rich, and then the rest of your books get terrible reviews and don’t sell? Or would you rather have a small, loyal following who love all of your books, but you still have to work a day job? And, no, you can’t choose earning just enough writing to live off of. One-time fame and then nothing, or lack of financial and critical success with loyal fans. Choose.”
I would choose making one hugely popular book, but not because I care for fame. You see, I have many MANY story ideas that I want to publish, in novel form, comic book form, and at least two video games. However, if I have to work a day job, it will be literally impossible for me to write all the stories I want. But if I have a single cash cow that gives me J. K. Rowling levels of wealth, I could place 100% of my focus on creating stories.
Not only would that financial freedom allow me to create whatever books I want without worrying about whether they’ll sell well, I would also be able to put as much money as I want into enriching those stories. Every single book I publish would be hardcovers with high quality paper and illustrations every 5 - 10 pages. Every audiobook would have a full cast of voice actors and contain original background music and sound effects. I could choose to adapt any of my novels into a Youtube series, TV shows, stage plays, video games, or movies. And I’d be able to pay for all of this out of pocket. No investors telling me I can’t do it, no debt forcing me to half-ass things, no restrictions whatsoever!
Would I be disappointed that audiences only like my cash cow? Yes. Would the lack of success for my other projects be disheartening? Sure. But I would be able to create all the stories I want before I die, so it would be worth the disappointment.
I'm sixty-nine and have been writing for nearly forty years. My work receives few if any reviews and doesn't sell. I don't need the money, but hell, I'll take the one hugely popular book. What have I got to lose?
Seriously, I enjoy the process of writing and have made many good friends with readers and fellow writers both offline and online over the years. Mark is one of them.
I am with you. Writing is a creative outlet for me. I have "met" many writers online and the experience has enriched my life. It sure isn't for the money. Of which there is precious little. But I do love those comments. And knowing someone enjoyed my writing. It is enough.
That Genie is mean! I mean it. Either or? Talk about wish block. So zero sum.
As for my wish, I can see being the writer of the next 'Catcher in the Rye,' or 'Grate Gatsby' (sic), and be taught in schools but rarely read.
But the online conversation is really where it's at. The last two years of sequestration frustration made me value those loyal readers who click like, comment, and hope I'll read, enjoy and comment on their output. Symbiosis at its best.
I am totally disappointed that Barbara Eden didn't show 😭 But the Writing Genie is pretty boss, too 😏😄
The thing is, I don't need a wish because I already have the second! 😄 Should I then wish for the runaway bestseller and throw a match over my shoulder, so long suckers style? What to do, what to do 🤔😄
Yes, all you have to do is write for free on the internet for five or ten years 😄 What I would wish for—though I heard her loud and clear and so I know it won't be granted—is a more enjoyable method of print publishing. There are many good digital options, but getting a book into wood is a real pain in the badonk.
Self-publishing paperbacks is fairly easy with Amazon and Lulu and others. I even made a hard cover version of my first novel for myself. Talk about a collector's edition. The one and only copy. 🤣
But getting people to buy your books is the crazy hard part. Unless you are already famous or have genie. 😉
Easy. Small success, loyal fans/online friends. Write what I like (mostly — occasionally come up with fan faves because hey, they don’t ask for much) when I feel like it. And be retired, so I don’t need the extra income.
I mean, it depends on my goals, right? If my goal is to write something amazing to benefit all of posterity and that happened through the hugely popular book it’s probably worth the sacrifice. But if my purpose is to influence the smaller (but equally important sphere) I’m actually in and my impact is more the ripple effect mode that could someday touch someone who does wield great power, I could be content with that too. (They say that people with the best relationships tend to live longest so there could be side benefits to not being “rich.”) I’m not sure either is a bad option. How’s that for decisive? Lol
I agree about writing something great that benefits mankind. But I was thinking more of fiction. 🤣 Which, like all the arts, definitely makes life better. So I guess that could qualify as benefiting all of posterity. 🤓
Anyway, it would be a tough choice. I think it would be hard to have one massive success and then nothing. I guess the money would have be consolation. You could always try a different creative field. But if continual writing success was your biggest dream, it would be depressing, I would think. Fortunately, few of us will ever meet the Writing Genie. 😉🤓
I would choose making one hugely popular book, but not because I care for fame. You see, I have many MANY story ideas that I want to publish, in novel form, comic book form, and at least two video games. However, if I have to work a day job, it will be literally impossible for me to write all the stories I want. But if I have a single cash cow that gives me J. K. Rowling levels of wealth, I could place 100% of my focus on creating stories.
Not only would that financial freedom allow me to create whatever books I want without worrying about whether they’ll sell well, I would also be able to put as much money as I want into enriching those stories. Every single book I publish would be hardcovers with high quality paper and illustrations every 5 - 10 pages. Every audiobook would have a full cast of voice actors and contain original background music and sound effects. I could choose to adapt any of my novels into a Youtube series, TV shows, stage plays, video games, or movies. And I’d be able to pay for all of this out of pocket. No investors telling me I can’t do it, no debt forcing me to half-ass things, no restrictions whatsoever!
Would I be disappointed that audiences only like my cash cow? Yes. Would the lack of success for my other projects be disheartening? Sure. But I would be able to create all the stories I want before I die, so it would be worth the disappointment.
Sounds like a good way to look at it. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your viewpoint, Writing Genies are pretty rare. 🤓
I wish they were less rare! I could use one!
I'm sixty-nine and have been writing for nearly forty years. My work receives few if any reviews and doesn't sell. I don't need the money, but hell, I'll take the one hugely popular book. What have I got to lose?
Seriously, I enjoy the process of writing and have made many good friends with readers and fellow writers both offline and online over the years. Mark is one of them.
I am with you. Writing is a creative outlet for me. I have "met" many writers online and the experience has enriched my life. It sure isn't for the money. Of which there is precious little. But I do love those comments. And knowing someone enjoyed my writing. It is enough.
I choose--. No. Wait. I want the--hold on. I change my mind. Let me think for a sec. Okay, I know what I want. Give me another minute to think.
She is a tough genie. I don't know if she will wait. 🤣
I love writing in retirement. Nuff said.
Making your own magic. 🤓
That Genie is mean! I mean it. Either or? Talk about wish block. So zero sum.
As for my wish, I can see being the writer of the next 'Catcher in the Rye,' or 'Grate Gatsby' (sic), and be taught in schools but rarely read.
But the online conversation is really where it's at. The last two years of sequestration frustration made me value those loyal readers who click like, comment, and hope I'll read, enjoy and comment on their output. Symbiosis at its best.
I agree. Since almost no one is making a living writing fiction anyway, the community aspect is the real value. It is the part I like best. 🤓
I am totally disappointed that Barbara Eden didn't show 😭 But the Writing Genie is pretty boss, too 😏😄
The thing is, I don't need a wish because I already have the second! 😄 Should I then wish for the runaway bestseller and throw a match over my shoulder, so long suckers style? What to do, what to do 🤔😄
Great. The second option is far more likely without a genie. But it does seem like a waste of a genie then. 🤣
Yes, all you have to do is write for free on the internet for five or ten years 😄 What I would wish for—though I heard her loud and clear and so I know it won't be granted—is a more enjoyable method of print publishing. There are many good digital options, but getting a book into wood is a real pain in the badonk.
Self-publishing paperbacks is fairly easy with Amazon and Lulu and others. I even made a hard cover version of my first novel for myself. Talk about a collector's edition. The one and only copy. 🤣
But getting people to buy your books is the crazy hard part. Unless you are already famous or have genie. 😉
Easy. Small success, loyal fans/online friends. Write what I like (mostly — occasionally come up with fan faves because hey, they don’t ask for much) when I feel like it. And be retired, so I don’t need the extra income.
{{{***POOF***}}}
Done
Well THAT was easy!
So no need to rub that lamp? Or did you already? 😉🤣
I helped Deb polish a silver-plated pot once. That’s all that comes close. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
🤣🤣
I mean, it depends on my goals, right? If my goal is to write something amazing to benefit all of posterity and that happened through the hugely popular book it’s probably worth the sacrifice. But if my purpose is to influence the smaller (but equally important sphere) I’m actually in and my impact is more the ripple effect mode that could someday touch someone who does wield great power, I could be content with that too. (They say that people with the best relationships tend to live longest so there could be side benefits to not being “rich.”) I’m not sure either is a bad option. How’s that for decisive? Lol
I agree about writing something great that benefits mankind. But I was thinking more of fiction. 🤣 Which, like all the arts, definitely makes life better. So I guess that could qualify as benefiting all of posterity. 🤓
Anyway, it would be a tough choice. I think it would be hard to have one massive success and then nothing. I guess the money would have be consolation. You could always try a different creative field. But if continual writing success was your biggest dream, it would be depressing, I would think. Fortunately, few of us will ever meet the Writing Genie. 😉🤓