21 Comments
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John K Adams's avatar

Mark, I missed this the first time around. Thanks for reposting. It is past time for the truth to come out.

BTW, that guy holding the potato masher was a great, great (lost count of how many, but pretty great) uncles of mine. Thanks for including him. He never got credit for anything.

Happy everything to you!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Your super great uncle was ahead of his time.

Thanks, John.

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Richard Ritenbaugh's avatar

This story reminds me a little of the "historical" writing of Will Cuppy. He wrote a book called "The Decline and Fall of Practically Everybody," which is hilarious! He uses footnotes to great effect. Thanks for this!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Thanks, Richard. I will check it out. 🤓

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Kim Smyth's avatar

I laughed out loud at the part about the long name in place of Thanksgiving. 😜🤣

Great story and Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, Mark! 🦃😘🙏

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Mark Starlin's avatar

Thanks, Kim. History is fascinating. 😉

Happy Thanksgiving.

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K.C. Knouse's avatar

Epic, Mark, simply epic. So many good lines. The only thing missing were the donuts and churros. Happy Thanksgiving, brother.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

No deep fryers either. It was tough being a pilgrim.

Thanks, K.C. 🤓

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K.C. Knouse's avatar

The real first Thanksgiving occured in San Elizario, TX near El Paso in 1598. See link https://www.texasalmanac.com/articles/the-first-thanksgiving

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Mark Starlin's avatar

There you go. More proof that History is wrong! I guess they had time machines in New Spain also.

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Sharron Bassano's avatar

Delicious seconds are allowed on Substack any time, Mark. Thank you for clearing up so many inaccuracies, dispelling myths, and sharing heretofore unknown details with us. You have truly improved my education this morning. Happy family day to you, turkey or no turkey.

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Mark Starlin's avatar

History is what I do best. 🤣

Happy Thanksgiving, Sharron!

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David Perlmutter's avatar

-"Most history books were written by people who weren’t there, writing about the past like they knew what they were talking about." These people are called "historians", and, even though they weren't there, they have combed through enough documents and media to know that these events existed in the first place.

-"I used my free time to insert myself into the group, masquerading as a Canadian fur trapper. I simply added “eh?” to the end of many of my sentences and talked about hockey a lot. They were none the wiser." Canada as such did not exist in the 1620s, not becoming an official nation until 1867. The ones who say "eh" and play hockey had yet to be born...

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Mark Starlin's avatar

You caught me, David.

Plus, many people now wouldn't know what New France was. 😉

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David Perlmutter's avatar

Sadly...

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Zoe Howland's avatar

Thank you for the smile today. You are so clever to be able to come up with that time machine!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I got a good deal on it used. But finding a Flux Capacitor for it was not easy.

Thanks, Zoe. 🤓

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3musesmerge's avatar

A veritable feast!

Thank you Mark.

I’m currently reading a book about historical literature adventures. It goes way back beyond BC. I keep asking myself… How could a modern day Brit know such things. 🤭

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Mark Starlin's avatar

They can’t. It’s wrong! 🤣

Unless they have a Time Machine. Or are Dr. Who.

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3musesmerge's avatar

Creative license!

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Mark Starlin's avatar

I can’t argue with that. 😉

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