One Minute Wit
Concrete Kites
If you are thinking of making a kite out of concrete,
DO NOT have your friend climb to the top of a cliff directly above you and toss the kite off to get it airborne.
I also suggest using ship anchor cable (preferably ocean liner or destroyer grade) instead of common string.
Winds exceeding 350 mph also seem to help with air buoyancy.
Music Stuff
The Renaissance Beatles
What if The Beatles had existed 400 years earlier?
The Beatles were a phenomenon both musically and culturally. Their popularity remains unmatched. Were they simply a product of their time? The perfect band arriving at the perfect moment?
I was thinking, would The Beatles have been as popular had they existed in Renaissance England? What would their songs have sounded like if they had been written then?
Perhaps like this:
I Am Desireth To Hold Thy Hand
Verily, I telleth thou something
I thinketh thou shalt understand
When I sayeth that something
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
O please sayeth to me
Thou wilt let me be thine man
And please sayeth to me
Thou wilt let me hold thine hand
Now let me hold thine hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
And when I touch thou, I feel blessed inside
It is such a feeling that my adoration, I canst not hideth
I canst not hideth
I canst not hideth
Verily thou, thou hast a distinctive nature
I thinketh thou shalt understand
When I sense that distinctive nature
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
I am desireth to hold thy hand
(I Want To Hold Your Hand)
Ob-la-di Ob-la-da (Life Continues Ceaselessly)
Sir Desmond and his servants take a barrow unto the market place
Maid Molly is a minstrel with The Bards.
Sir Desmond sayeth unto maid Molly‚ “Maiden I admire your countenance”
Maid Molly sayeth thus as she taketh him by the hand
“Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly
Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly”
Sir Desmond taketh a warhorse to the jewellers’ store
Purchases a twenty carat golden ring
Returneth unto Maid Molly, who doth tarry at the door
As he presenteth it unto his fair maiden she commences to sing
“Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly
Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly”
In a couple of summers they hath constructed a castle, strong castle
With a pair of halflings running in the yard
Of Sir Desmond and Lady Molly Jones
Blessed eternally in the market place
Sir Desmond alloweth the halflings to lendeth a hand
Lady Molly remaineth at the castle and attendeth to her fair face
Whist in the evening she still sings great tales with The Bards
“Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly
Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly”
In a couple of summers they hath constructed a castle, strong castle
With a pair of halflings running in the yard
Of Sir Desmond and Lady Molly Jones
Blessed eternally in the market place
Sir Desmond alloweth the halflings to lendeth a hand
Lady Molly remaineth at the castle and attendeth to her fair face
Whist in the evening she still sings great tales with The Bards
“Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly
Ob-la-di Ob-la-da, life continues ceaselessly, brothor
La la, how thine life continues ceaselessly”
If thou desire a jest‚ sing “Ob-la-di Ob-la-da”
(Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da (Life Goes On))
Assistance!
Assistance! I beseech thou
Assistance! Not any soul wilst do
Assistance! Thou knowest I besought thou
Assistance!
When I wast less mature, exceedingly less mature than this day,
I required another soul’s assistance nary a bit,
Those times of yore are past and I stand unassured of mine standing,
I witness I hath changed my thoughts, I have opened up mine gates
Assist me if thou can, I wax despondent,
Yet I appreciate thou remaining in mine company,
Assist me in getting mine feet back in mine saddle,
Will not thou please please assisteth me?
Presently my life hath changed in ways untold
My freedom seemeth a ghost in the mist,
Yet time and again I feel so craven,
I knoweth that I require thou unlike ever I did past
Assist me if thou can, I wax despondent,
Yet I appreciate thou remaining in mine company,
Assist me in getting mine feet back in mine saddle,
Will not thou please please assisteth me?
When I wast less mature, exceedingly less mature than this day,
I required another soul’s assistance nary a bit,
Those times of yore are past and I stand unassured of mine standing,
I witness I hath changed my thoughts, I have opened up mine gates
Assist me if thou can, I wax despondent,
Yet I appreciate thou remaining in mine company,
Assist me in getting mine feet back in mine saddle,
Will not thou kindly, kindly assisteth me?
Assisteth me
Assisteth me
Mercy, mercy, mercy
(Help!)
She Loveth Thou
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily, verily
Thou thinketh thou lost thy love
Well, I encountered her yesterday
It is thou she thinketh of
And she relayed what to covey
She sayeth she loveth thou
And thou knowest that canst not be bad
Verily, she loveth thou
And thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad
She said thou hurteth her so
She almost lost her mind
But now she said she knoweth
Thou art not the hurting kind
She sayeth she loveth thou
And thou knowest that canst not be bad
Verily, she loveth thou
And thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad, Oh
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
And with a love like that
Thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad
Thou knoweth it depends on thou
I think it only fair
Pride can hurteth thou also
Apologize to her
Because she loves thou
And thou know that canst not be bad
Verily, she loveth thou
And thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad, Oh
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
She loveth thou, verily, verily, verily
With a love like that
Thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad
With a love like that
Thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad
With a love like that
Thou knoweth thou shouldst be glad
Verily, verily, verily
Verily, verily, verily, verily
(She Loves You)
Whilst My Lute Gently Weepeth
I looketh on thou all, see the love that hath lain sleeping
Whilst my lute gently weepeth
I looketh at the floor and I see it needs sweeping
Still my lute gently weepeth
I knoweth not why no soul toldeth thou
How to unfoldeth thy love
I knoweth not how some soul controlleth thou
They bought and sold thou
I looketh on the world and I notice it be turning
Whilst my lute gently weepeth
With every mistake we must surely be learning
Still my lute gently weepeth
I knoweth not how thou wert diverted
Thou wert perverted also
I knoweth not how thou were inverted
No one alerted thou
I looketh on thou all, seeth the love that hath lain sleeping
Whilst my lute gently weepeth
I then looketh on thou all
Still my lute gently weepeth
(While My Guitar Gently Weeps)
Eight Sunrises A Weke
Oh, I need thy love, mineheart, I imagine thou knowest it true
Hopeth thou need my love, mineheart, just like I need thou
Holdeth me, loveth me
Holdeth me, loveth me
I posess nothing but love mineheart
Eight sunrises a weke
Loveth thou every day, maiden, thou art always on my mind
One thing I can relate, maiden, I loveth thou eternally
Holdeth me, loveth me
Holdeth me, loveth me
I posess nothing but love mineheart
Eight sunrises a weke
Eight sunrises a weke I loveth thou,
Eight sunrises a weke is not enough to display my affection
O I need thy love, mineheart, I imagine thou knowest it true
Hopeth thou need my love mineheart, just like I need thou
Holdeth me, loveth me
Holdeth me, loveth me
I posess nothing but love, mineheart
Eight sunrises a weke
Eight sunrises a weke I loveth thou,
Eight sunrises a weke is not enough to display my affection
Loveth thou every day, maiden, thou art always on my mind
One thing I can relate, maiden, I loveth thou eternally
Holdeth me, loveth me
Holdeth me, loveth me
I posess nothing but love, mineheart
Eight sunrises a weke
Eight sunrises a weke
Eight sunrises a weke
(Eight Days A Week)
Perhaps the 1960s was a better era for The Beatles music.
Stock Photo Story
No One Predicted That
Jacob and Ling were excited by the forecast. They went outside and gazed up at the falling snow. Then Jacob noticed something.
“Is there supposed to be a giant rock hurtling down from the sky today?”
“Crap, every time…”
Stock Photo Stories give you the real stories behind the photos. That I might have made up.
Happy Monday. Thanks for reading and responding. You make it fun.
Mark
The Renaissance Beatles
Renaissance Beatles - see if you can find a Renaissance music group interested in updating their music selection (still have a Vox Box record of Renaissance music 😛 along with most of the Beatles records).
Concrete Kites - Flying your concrete kite during a hurricane may also help!
The Renaissance Beatles - I think that “Here Cometh The Sun” and “Yellow Underwater Ship” could’ve done well during the Renaissance.
No One Predicted That - “Is there supposed to be a giant rock hurtling down from the sky today?” My immediate thought was that the “rock” was actually a concrete kite.