Choosing A Dog
The Perils Of Busking • Inescapable Magic • Sounds Of The Desert Night
One Minute Wit
The Perils Of Busking
“I am never playing it again, Mariam. I simply can not abide it.”
“Yes, you will, Giorgi. It gets the most requests. And tips.”
“But it is ridiculous. A boy and the Devil dueling with violins in Georgia? I see no sense in it.”
“True, it is absurd. But it makes vastly more sense than Benny And The Jets. I am confident I will never decipher those lyrics.”
“I dearly wish that guitar player from the future had never visited us and given you that Best Of The 70s Songbook.”
100-Word Story
Inescapable Magic
Clifton the Great was 978 years old. He was a wizard in his early years. But as the world changed, he became a magician. Eventually, no one believed in magic anymore, only science.
“No one wants magic anymore,” the television network boss said as he broke the news that Clifton’s magic show was canceled.
Clifton walked into the empty studio and waved his wand. All the cameras turned on and started filming as Clifton took the stage. Then he waved his wand again. Every remote control on Earth changed the channel to Clifton’s show.
I’ll show them magic, Clifton thought.
Adventuring
Sounds Of The Desert Night
Adventurer Winfred Lookabout
Log Entry
Many men have tried to cross this desert.
Some on camels.
Some in jeeps.
Some with camels in their jeeps.
Some knew the way.
Some didn’t.
Some got lost.
Some got found.
Some are still out there.
Some got bit by scorpions.
Some bit scorpions. You want to avoid those people if possible.
Some tried to make a sand ship with a sail to carry them across the waves of sand. That’s a stupid idea.
Some were looking for a lost city of gold. I doubt any city of gold will ever get lost.
Some traveled in caravans.
Some ran screaming like madmen.
Some never slept the whole trip.
Some saw mirages.
Some saw unspeakable horrors.
Some went crazy.
Some never spoke.
Some saw the desert turn into ocean.
Some saw a horse with no name.
Sigh…
Listen, I can keep this up all night. But if you would just share some of that beef jerky you brought, I will shut up and let you sleep.
— My guide on our first night in the desert.
Story
Choosing A Dog
-1961-
Joey Nextstop was a Milk Man. He delivered milk to all the residents of West Lake. Joey enjoyed talking to his customers, but when he got home from work, he got lonely. He wanted some companionship. So he decided to get a dog.
Joey went to a breeder and found a beautiful dog. It appeared perfect in every way. The next day on his milk route, the dog sat in the passenger seat next to him.
Betsy Glassemptier, one of his customers, noticed the dog and said, “What a beautiful dog!”
“Thank you. Her name is Belle,” Joey replied.
A week later Joey returned the dog. The breeder asked why.
Joey replied, “She appears perfect, but it is all show. I offered her my love, but she is selfish and only cares about what others think of her. She has no love for me.”
Joey went to another trainer and found an incredibly smart, well-trained dog. The next day on his route, the dog jumped out of the front of the truck, ran around, and opened the back door for Joey.
Betsy Glassemptier saw the spectacle and said, “Oh my. What a clever animal!”
“Thank you. His name is Einstein,” Joey replied.
A week later Joey returned the dog. The trainer asked why.
Joey replied, “He is brilliant, but his heart is cold. I offered him my love, but he only cares about things he can do well. He has no love for me.”
On the way home, Joey saw a stray dog hobbling down the street. It had matted hair and was missing a leg, but he decided to take it in. The next day on his route, the dog rode with him. Betsy Glassemptier saw Joey and said, “Did you get a new dog?”
“Yes, Ma’am. Let me show you.”
Joey lifted the dog out of the truck and set him on the ground.
“His name is Trey,” Joey said.
Betsy’s eyes got big, and she said, “Oh. Well, I need to run. Nice talking to you.” Then she hurried off.
The following week Betsy spotted Trey in Joey’s truck and said, “I am surprised you still have that dog. No offense, but he is kind of ugly, can barely walk, and you have to lift him into your truck.”
Joey replied, “You are right. He is flawed in some ways. But he loves me, and I love him. In my eyes he is perfect.”
Betsy didn’t understand. She shook her head and walked away.
Trey looked at Joey and wagged his tail.
Happy Monday.
Mark
Wonderful!
A fun batch of stories, Mark!